Vorgewarnt durch die letzten Jahre, in denen wir jeweils zusammengerechnet einige Meter Schnee hatten, hatte ich beschlossen, eine kleine Schneefräse zu kaufen. Eigentlich bin ich ja nicht soo der Fan von diesen Dingern, aber praktisch sind sie schon, wenn man aus der Einfahrt zuerst 30 m³ von dem weißen Zeug wegräumen muß, um überhaupt rauszukommen…
Und außerdem war’s ein Sonderangebot: statt 895 Dollar plus 13% Märchensteuer, waren es nur noch 595 Dollar plus Märchensteuer – da hätte ich ja fast Geld verloren, wenn ich nicht gekauft hätte! 

Morgen isses soweit! Nachdem die Schneefräse bisher ein tristes Dasein in der finsteren, kalten Garage verbracht hat, wird sie morgen endlich Frischluft schnuppern dürfen!
Bis zu 25 cm soll es morgen runterkloppen!

Aufsitzrasenmäher, Schneefräse… irgendwann werde ich noch ein richtiger “Redneck”

Passend dazu ein richtiger Redneck-Hit für euch:

Ich weiß, ich weiß… das Niveau dieses Blogs sinkt und sinkt!

Hier isses:

Which one is the strongest beer in the world?
The quest of brewing the strongest beer has been going on for a long, long time. One of the earliest contenders was the Samichlaus beer („St. Nicholas beer“), first brewed in Switzerland by the now defunct Hürlimann brewery. It is still produced today, in Austria rather than in Switzerland, by the Schloss Eggenberg brewery.
The Samichlaus beer has an alcohol content of 14%.

Then, a couple of years ago, in 2002, the Boston Beer Company came out with their Sam Adams Utopias beer. It originally had 21% alcohol by volume, but subsequent Utopias went up to 27% over time.
In 2009 a bottle of Utopias, which looks like a copper brewing kettle, went for the modest sum of 150 US-Dollar.

In 2008 Georg Tscheuschner, owner of the Schorschbräu brewery in Bavaria, discovered his passion for strong beers. He created a beer with 31% alcohol, a so-called Eisbock, where cold is used to freeze out unwanted water from the beer to make it stronger.

Since then a race ensued between Mr. Tscheuschner and the BrewDog brewery of Scotland.
BrewDog soon after came out with a beer with 32%, which was topped by Mr. Tscheuschner with a beer with 40% alcohol. And so on, and so forth…

Until, in 2011, the BrewDog brewery came out with a beer with 55% and declared the competition for over. There were only 12 bottles produced, which each sold for between 500 £ and 700£, depending whether the bottle was stuffed in a dead grey squirrel (more expensive) or in a dead stoat (cheaper).
„It is only over when I say it’s over“ were purportedly Mr. Tscheuschner’s words, who immediately upon ushering this statement created a beer with 57.5% alcohol by volume.

It will become almost impossible for Mr. Tscheuschner to make a stronger beer, since he is located in Bavaria and thus bound by the german purity law for beer, which forbids any other ingredients other than malt, water, yeast and hops. „In order to get more alcohol I would have to add sugar, and that is out of the question“ he said.

It is a rather difficult thing to produce such a strong beer. To make one single liter of the Schorschbock 57, Mr. Tscheuschner needs to use 30 liters of his regular Bock beer, which is the reason that only 36 .33 liter bottles were produced and sold, for 200 € each (approx. 280 Canadian Dollars).

How does such a beer taste? The high alcohol content will it make taste more like a Cognac than a regular beer, it really is more something for collectors and beer geeks rather than avid beer drinkers.

Das mit den Eichhörnchen ist wirklich wahr, hier ist der Beweis:

Besonders prickelnd find' ich das nicht mehr...

Chef kam wieder mal an, und meinte so, daß wir dieses Jahr voll viel Bier an die Bierbewertungsstelle schicken müßten, damit wir viele Medaillen kriegen und so mehr Bier verkaufen.
Worauf ich nichts besseres zu erwidern hatte, als daß mir Medaillen für Biere scheißegal sind, und das einzige was zähle wären die Verkaufszahlen – wenn die Leute nämlich ein Bier kaufen, dann muß es relativ gut sein!

Meinte Chef so: “Aber mir sind Medaillen wichtig, denn die sind ein Verkaufsargument und belegen den Erfolg einer Brauerei.”

Und jetzt kommt’s: “Ich finde diese Bewertungen sind eigentlich nur ein Kasperltheater, die Juroren sind doch eigentlich sogar zu dämlich um ihren Arsch von Bier unterscheiden zu können…”

Übertroffen habe ich mich dann auch noch selber, denn ich mußte ja noch unbedingt loswerden, daß mir “Swiss cheese”, made in Toronto, ziemlich auf den Keks geht, und daß ich ein Oktoberfestbier, daß rein gar nicht nach Oktoberfest schmeckt, mir ebenfalls bestenfalls Übelkeit verursacht.

Falls ihr nichts mehr von mir hört, wurde ich entlassen, und suche mir gerade einen neuen Job… irgendwo in Europa.

Dieser Smiley hat gar nichts mit diesem Post zu tun, den gibt’s einfach so dazu!

How do I judge a beer?

„This beer tastes like horse piss“ might be your personal opinion about a particular brand of beer, but it is certainly not a statement that adequately describes a beer to somebody – unless you drink horse urine all the time and know what you’re talking about.
Judging a beer is not about whether you like the beer or not, it should be an unbiased description of the taste and the appearance of a beer.

To adequately describe a beer it needs a lot of training and a lot of imagination. Your sight is just as important as your smell, while your taste sense is of course the most important.
You should also get some knowledge about the four ingredients that make up a good beer: what is malt, what different types of malts exist and what do they taste like? How does the hop make beer bitter, and what other properties does it have? What types of yeast exist, and what flavor profiles do they elicit in a beer? Were any other ingredients used in the production? And finally you need to know what a specific type of beer is supposed to taste like (the so called „beer styles“).

Some beers on this planet might not be even close to what you think a beer should taste like – just think of the „Berliner Weisse“ which is typically fermented with lactic acid, giving it an intense sour taste (so sour that it is usually sweetened with raspberry or woodruff syrup).

Make sure the glass you are about to use is clean. It should be a simple, cylindrical and thinly walled clear glass so you can properly evaluate the colour, the carbonation, the foam and the clarity of the beer. Next smell the beer and find out what it reminds you of. Sweet and grainy smells are caused by the malt. Bitter, floral, grassy or citrussy flavors originate from hops.

Now it is time to take the first sip. The mouthfeel is usually classified into light, medium or full bodied and depends on the residual amount of dextrins (sugars) in the beer. Now try to define the taste even more: is the malt sweetness or the hop bitterness dominant? Or are they well balanced? And, very important, does the flavor fit the flavor profile?

After swallowing, what taste does it leave behind? Sweet or bitter, lingering or gone immediately, pleasant or unpleasant? This part is called the finish of the beer.
Take notes and discuss your results with your buddies. Beer judging can be a lot of fun, but don’t exaggerate: max. two or three different beers at at time, then your palate needs a little rest!

And: don’t judge (drink) and drive!

Uff, bloß noch zwei… ich tue mich schon schwer damit, mir so blödelige Themen auszudenken! Falls jemand Vorschläge hat…?

Wie jedes Jahr gibt es Steaks mit Pommes und Hummer, den ich allerdings immer meiner bessere Hälfte mitbringe. Sie macht sich was aus den Viechern, ich bin ihnen in kulinarischer Form nicht unbedingt abgeneigt, stehe ihnen aber doch eher indifferent gegenüber.
Man könnte auch sagen, ich mache mir nicht sonderlich viel draus.

Traditionell wird dann gewichtelt – hier heißt das ganze dann “Secret Santa”. Ich habe ein Sweatshirt aus Polyester bekommen. Mehr kann man nicht erwarten, wenn man sich auf höchstens 20.- Dollar geeinigt hat.
Ich habe ein Zippo für 45.- Dollar verschenkt. Weil ich nett bin.

Danach wurde es Zeit für die Ausschüttung unseres “Christmas bonus”, also unserer Weihnachtsgratifikation.
Dieses Jahr hat jeder Angestellte eine Polyester-Werbejacke erhalten.
Immerhin mit Aufdruck “Premium Lager”, das übrigens weggeht wie warme Semmeln (schön zu wissen, daß man sein Handwerk nicht ganz verlernt hat vor lauter Blödmännern, die hier immer mitreden wollen).

Hatte ich schon erwähnt, daß die örtliche Konkurrenzbrauerei 12%ige Umsatzeinbußen hinnehmen mußte? Und die Brauerei aus einer etwas weiter entfernten Stadt sogar minus 20% eingefahren hat?
Und daß die Brauerei, in der ich arbeite,  zum Vorjahr stabil geblieben ist?

Ich hoffe mal, daß diese Jacken irgendwann mal begehrt sind; vielleicht kann ich mir dann auf Ebay meinen Bonus verdienen…

Beer makes beautiful?

Believe it or not, but besides being a very healthy drink with lots of vitamins and minerals, beer holds another secret: beer actually makes one beautiful.
Already over 2’000 years ago Pliny the elder described in one of his writings that Egyptian women would use beer foam to treat their skin. This practice was then taken over by the Roman women and remained a recipe for beauty not only in ancient times. It is said that even Duchess Louise of Mecklenburg-Strelitz, former queen of Prussia known for her beauty and her vibrant looks, used beer to nourish the delicate skin of her cleavage.
But not only women use beer for beauty; for many men it is almost equal to a catastrophe when they start losing their hair, and a very simple way to get fuller, healthier looking hair is to rinse it with beer. Take equal amounts of beer and egg yolk (if you want you may also mix in regular shampoo), massage it onto your scalp and leave on for four minutes before rinsing it out. After a couple of weeks you will notice an improvement in your hair quality.
The reason behind this is that in order to grow, the hair follicles need vitamins and minerals. By using the beer shampoo you are supplying your hair with exactly that: everything it needs to grow strong and healthy!
Suffering from acne? Beer can help! You will need to find an unfiltered beer though, because the active ingredient now is the yeast. Yeast contains a lot of vitamins, especially lots of vitamin B6 (Pyridoxine), which speeds up the energy metabolism of skin cells and helps to reduce fatty deposits on the skin.
A lot of yeast can be found in German style „Weissbier“ or „Weizen“ (same beer, but in the north it’s called Weizen, in the south it’s called Weissbier) or in any bottle fermented beer.
If you don’t like the taste of the beer, then there is still hope: you can find brewer’s yeast tablets in pretty much any pharmacy or supermarket out there – a healthy, natural and cheap supplement.
And if you just need to relax from a stressful day at work: how about a beer bath? Fill your bath tub about halfway with warm water, a little warmer than usual. Add a bottle (or two, or three, or four…) of your favourite beer and enjoy!
The minerals, vitamins, amino acids and enzymes will boost your metabolism, the hop in the beer will help you to relax and unwind, and the CO2 will stimulate the blood flow.
If everything else fails: just have a pint or two at your favourite pub – at least you will feel more beautiful! Prost!

­Where does the Oktoberfest come from?

The original Bavarian Oktoberfest started out as a horse race on the 12th of October 1810 to celebrate the wedding of Ludwig I. of Bavaria with Therese of Saxe-Hildburghausen. It has since become an internationally known annual event, held in the center of the 1.3 million people city of Munich, the capital of Bavaria.
It takes place every year in September and lasts until the first weekend in October. It was decided to antedate the festival into September for the people to enjoy the usually warmer days.
Just how big is the Oktoberfest nowadays? The maritime provinces are currently home to 1.7 million people. If every man, woman and child in those provinces would visit the Oktoberfest four times consecutively – that’s how many people attended the Oktoberfest 2011: almost 7 million people.
And 7 million people get thirsty! In the 17 days of Oktoberfest 2011 they drank 7.5 million liters of beer – the equivalent to a 15-year production period for Moncton based Pump House brewery!
Of course there is no good party without good food, and the same is true for the Wies’n (pronounced veezn – meaning „meadow“), as locals call the Oktoberfest. The dimensions are just a bit off from a regular party: this year 118 entire oxen ended up in the stomachs of the hungry crowd, together with 53 whole calfs, more than 500’000 chickens, over 40 tons of fish and 220’000 sausages. Plus an uncountable amount of bread rolls („Semmeln“) and pretzels („Brez’n“).
The 14 big beer tents can host more than 100’000 people, the entirety of the population of metropolitan Moncton, at the same time! But of course there are 18 more tents, just a wee bit smaller, which offer another 5’000 seats.
The beer served at the Oktoberfest is especially made for this occassion, and only Munich breweries are allowed to serve their brews at the Wies’n, nobody else. Not even a descendant of Ludwig I., who owns a brewery just 50 km away from Munich! The beer is a „Märzen“ type beer („March-beer“), stronger in gravity and alcohol content (between 5% and 6%).
The name derives from the fact that brewers need to store their beer at cool temperatures, which, in old times, was achieved by putting ice blocks in the beer cellar. As the last ice blocks could be collected in March, this was also the last opportunity to brew beer. The higher alcohol content of the Märzen acted as a natural preservative for the beer, which could thus be kept throughout the summer, until the new brewing season started.

Vielleicht lernen die hier ja doch noch ein bißchen was dazu…

Ach so, hier der Text:

­What is the „beer purity law“?

Oak and birch bark, myrtle, myrica gale, urine, hypericum, eggs, a wide variety of kitchen herbs, henbane and datura (both plants containing hyoscyamine/atropine and scopolamine), marsh labrador tea (also called wild rosemary, containing terpenes – well-known for causing aggressive behavior), salt and many more things were used in ancient times to spice up beer.
Until two dukes, Wilhelm IV. and Ludwig X., decided in the year 1516 that enough is enough. They established a law that forbade to use anything but only barley, hops and water to produce beers. This law is now known as the „Reinheitsgebot“, or in English translation as the beer Purity Law.
„Is it still up-to-date?“ you might ask. We are writing the year 2011, almost 500 years after this law was signed.
Granted, nobody puts the classic „witches’ weeds“ henbane (causes visual hallucinations), datura (causing delirious states and sometimes death) and mandrake (contains deliriant hallucinogenic tropane alkaloids) in beer. In fact, nobody puts anything dangerous in beer anymore; at least not on purpose.
Nor does any brewer pee in the beer anymore – although it would provide the yeast with valuable minerals and vitamins, the yuck!-factor is just too big.
But what about gelatin, isinglass or Irish Moss, used to clarify beer? Gelatin is a product made out of hooves, cow or pig skin, isinglass is made out of the swim bladder of sturgeon, and Irish Moss is made out of algaes. All of them are unnecessary to brew a good beer, yet some brewers insist in using them.
Other additives used in beer production are high maltose/fructose corn syrup (contributing to obesity, cardiovascular diseases, diabetes), propylene glycol (antifreeze and lubricant [e.g. condoms] – not toxic per se, but having an enormously negative impact on marine life), silicone oil (defoamer) and artificial enzymes to speed up the brewing process.
Are these additives necessary? No, absolutely not. Why do some brewers keep using them? It’s all about money, of course. Some additives or adjuncts (sugars or unmalted grain like rice, corn or wheat) greatly reduce the time necessary to produce a beer, saving the brewer lots of money. Artificial enzymes save a lot of money by not having to treat the mash at different temperatures to let natural enzymes work.
And the list goes on and on.
If you want a good, naturally produced beer, ask some questions; a good brewer will have nothing to hide. And yes, the beer Purity Law is still up to date. Prost!

Ich werde berichten, wie es sich so entwickelt.

Ach ja: morgen fängt im Hauptrestaurant das “Oktoberfest” an… arme Welt!

”Und ohne Bier, was fang’ ich an?
Da bin ich ein geschlagner Mann:
An Leib und Seel verschmacht’ ich schier,
wenn ich nicht hab’ mein Seidel Bier.
Drum mag mir Gott mein Seidel geben,
in diesem und in jenem Leben!”

Quasi das Wort zum Sonntag…